After listening to a radio broadcast asking for men to form what has been named Local Defence Volunteers (later to be renamed the Home Guard), George Mainwaring, a local bank manager, decides to act a…

With the shortage of weapons, Capt. Mainwaring goes to the local museum to see if any of the guns on display can be used by the platoon.

Capt. Mainwaring, worried about the lack of weapons, gets a visit from Col. Square, an old soldier who offers to donate some guns from his collection, providing he can take command of the platoon. Mai…

Capt. Mainwaring is giving a lecture on recognising enemy agents when he learns that for every Nazi captured there is a reward. Later on Jones and Walker capture two Luftwaffe airmen, although a Polis…

Just when the platoon finally gets its uniforms, LCpl. Jones is told that unless he can complete the assault course in 15 minutes he will have to leave, so Mainwaring and the rest of the platoon think…

When news that the Prime Minister is to pay a visit to the area a shooting contest is held to see which of the local platoons will form the Guard of Honour. Walker gets a crack shot from the theatre t…

When six members of the Highland Regiment attack the Warmington-on-Sea's HQ, the platoon has to come up with a scheme to capture the attackers.

When the church bells start to ring, the platoon leaps into action. Jones takes half the platoon to Godfrey's cottage to set up a machine gun post while Wilson, not knowing where Jones has gone, also …

Walker is finally called up but Mainwaring tries to get his call-up deferred because of his value to the platoon, but he is still conscripted, only to find out that he is allergic to the army's corned…

Wilson overhears Mrs Pike telling Frank that she is expecting. Wilson assumes that she is pregnant and that he is the father, but it turns out that she's looking after an evacuee. Mainwaring advises t…

Mainwaring promotes Frazer to Lance Corporal, thus causing friction between him and Jones. When Frazer starts getting above himself, Mainwaring rescinds the promotion.

The platoon is fire watching when the men see a man using a torch. Convinced that they have discovered a spy, they arrest him only to find that they have made a terrible mistake.

Mainwaring's lecture is a total mess due to gas masks. To obtain rationed petrol, Joe convinces Jones to volunteer his butcher's van as platoon car. Alas, after they worked for days to make it fit for…

It's Mainwaring's platoon's turn for a weekend of guerrilla warfare training at a rural facility. Thanks to train delay and the captain's disastrous sense of direction, they arrive late for dinner and…

Mainwaring gives the platoon a lecture in communications but when a German plane crashes into the town's reservoir, it becomes obvious that many of the men have no idea how to use a telephone and, whe…

Mainwaring is extremely annoyed that the platoon – sans Godfrey, who was too slow – have used up all their ammunition firing in vain at a low-flying German aeroplane. An inquiry is ordered – along wit…

An unannounced bank inspector from head office is far from impressed by Mainwaring's bumbling while handling some minor cash deposit and black market matters with Jones and Walker. He gets really angr…

Wilson secretly enjoys passing on HQ Captain Bailey's finding that Mainwaring's captain's commission in the original local militia days is invalid, so he'll be reduced to lieutenant, as befits a plato…

A large field gun has been delivered for demonstration but none of the platoon know how it works. After a process of trial and error using models to represent the town, the time comes for the gun to b…

After Mainwaring complains of sloppy slauting, a runaway barrage balloon appears with the Verger clinging onto it. He's rescued and various people, including Godfrey's sister Cissie, are asked to hang…

Pike's work is suffering due to distraction from his girlfriend Violet, whom Mainwaring regards as common as her mother used to clean for him. Furthermore, at the upcoming platoon dance, Pike is going…

The platoon are on guard duty on a derelict pier, which they have reached by boat but, thanks to Pike's clumsiness, the boat has floated away, carrying their food. Hodges rows out in a children's boat…

Godfrey reveals that he was a Conscientious Objector during WWI, leading Mainwaring and some of the platoon to brand him as a coward. However, during an exercise in which Mainwaring collapses with smo…

Walker has found a discarded parachute which he cuts up to make ladies' knickers. This leads to an embarrassing examination of the ladies' pants to determine their colour as British parachutes are whi…

During weapons inspection, Mainwaring scolds Frazer for losing a single spring, rendering the Lewis gun useless, and HQ has no spare parts, so even a court-martial may follow. Frazer believes a coffin…

When a bank client's debt means his rowing boat must be auctioned, Mainwaring can't resist acquiring it for river patrols, however overstretched his men already are. Frazer supplements the nautical no…

A parade is organised through Walmington-on-Sea to commemorate Spitfire Week and, after watching a newsreel, the platoon decide it would be splendid to have a mascot. Sponge farms sheep and the men tr…

The platoon is to participate in an exercise to place a supposed bomb in a windmill occupied by the Eastgate men. It is decided that, as the mill is by water, Frazer, in an ancient diving suit left hi…

Dissent in the ranks follows after a foot inspection as a result of which Mainwaring decides the platoon need their feet toughening up and proposes barefoot football as well as a 20-mile route march. …

The platoon are on night watch in a beach hut, waiting for Pike to bring their tea but Pike has got himself tangled up on barbed wire in the middle of a minefield. Waiting for an engineer to free him,…

The platoon is to guard a POW camp housing Italian soldiers and Mainwaring is suspicious because Walker seems rather too friendly with them. However, Walker explains that he uses them as cheap labour …

On return from London, Mainwaring is shocked to find that almost all of the platoon are playing in a darts tournament against Hodges and the wardens, which they refuse to leave, despite losing. Wilson…

Mainwaring fears the Nazis may send spies across the Channel, so he orders the lighthouse manned by Jones, Pike, Godfrey and Frazer, who tells a terrifying story. The trio accidentally start the mecha…

Elderly ex-soldier Clarke joins the platoon and, by coincidence, it turns out that he and Jones were in the same regiment in 1890s Sudan. However, he paints a picture of a cowardly Jones who left him …

Mainwaring decides to enlist women to assist with the war effort. After initial interviews go rather less than satisfactory, Mrs Fiona Grey walks into his office and into his life. Mainwaring is flatt…

When the platoon is challenged to a cricket match by the ARP wardens, Mainwaring appoints himself captain and gives the standard inept lecture. They can only hope to make up, in effort, what they pres…

Mainwaring is furious to learn that Wilson is leaving to become manager of the Eastgate branch, where HQ has also appointed him platoon commander with a promotion to Second Lieutenant. While everyone …

Once more, the civic vicar's hospitality for both Home Guard and ARP forces the rival corps' men to cohabit in the church. This time, Mainwaring and Hodges even have to share the vicar's desk at the s…

The platoon gets its turn at weekend training, for a bomb course. Captain Square convinces Mainwaring that officers shouldn't sleep with the OR (other ranks) so he puts up blankets for him and Wilson,…

A bomb hits the gasworks where Godfrey and Walker are on duty and the platoon and Hodges go to rescue them from a small room in which Godfrey is asleep. Jones, in an outer chamber, slams the door, bri…

The War Office plans a review of both the Home Guard and the ARP in order to decide which less fit soldiers of the first and less fit of the second should be transferred. As this is the last thing tha…

On the way home after an unpatriotic night at the cinema, Mainwaring comes to the assistance of a clippie being accosted by Hodges. In his dreams, Mainwaring is Napoleon with the clippie as Josephine.

Rumours abound when Wilson is seen with an attractive young woman in a WREN's uniform, causing an argument between himself and Mainwaring who catches him sleeping off a hangover in the church hall. Su…

The platoon are on an exercise whereby everyone—except for Godfrey and Jones—ends up in a deserted barn. Jones sees from the map that they have been given the wrong reference and the barn will be blow…

After another of Mainwaring's long, creative, 'vital' lectures, Frazer is voted the unfortunate duty of complainant representative for the platoon. Mainwaring tries a suggestion from the manual: the t…

The platoon's first-ever private party, thrown by Mainwaring at his disappointingly blasé home, proves unamusing. It's cut short anyhow by a bomb alert — a hit on his bank! The money is carried to the…

Godfrey asks for holiday in order to help a farming ex-girlfriend bring in the harvest. Recognising it as vital to the war effort, Mainwaring assigns the whole platoon to help.

Entrusted with £500 by local shopkeepers, Jones brings it to the bank only to find a pound of sausages instead. Frazer hypnotises him into recalling when he last saw the money, apparently stuffing a c…

At a business community function, where both Wilson and Walker outshine him, Mainwaring accepts a challenge to prove his men are a match for the Home Guard's new, regularly trained, physically superio…

Square ridicules Mainwaring for the pitiful state of his men's rifles. The captain rudely denies it but internally blames Wilson's lax inspection techniques and overall poor style. Worse is to come wh…

The War Office tests an experimental invention for delivering explosives. For secrecy, the test is done on the coast, using three local platoons. Mainwaring's vanity is weaponised to make him blindly …

The platoon is called to seize a German pilot whose parachute is caught on the church steeple clock. Getting him down is hard enough, given the language barrier. Then Jones manages to drop the ladder …

After a surreal lecture on separating allied parachutists from German ones, the platoon is ordered to pick up a stranded U-boat crew. Wilson feels live hand-grenades are too dangerous for his hothead …

After two and a half years, the Americans have finally decided to enter the European war. Walmington-on-Sea gets to welcome an advanced group, and the platoon organise a welcome party. Given the ratio…

Mainwaring gathers his troops for the secretive reading of top-secret orders, concerning the passage – no actual stop – of the royal train. The mood darkens when everyone else already seems in on the …

Mainwaring is determined that his platoon should earn the full quota of a dozen stars in a wacky test weekend. Captain Ramsey is in charge and increases the psychological pressure. The intel Wilson he…

When it becomes known an uncle's death granted Wilson to inherit an Honourable Aristocrat title, all Walmington-on-Sea flatters and woos him... except Mainwaring, whose jealous envy is all but noble. …

During a nightly patrol in terrible weather, the platoon run out of rationed petrol for Jones's van, so they spend the night in what they initially believe is an abandoned house. There, a drenched Pik…

Whilst Mainwaring is in hospital, Wilson is in charge. Following Walker's speedy departure back to London, leaving only a note behind, Wilson decides to make up the platoon's numbers by allowing the v…

As all the road signs have been removed, the platoon are ordered to put up temporary ones to help a large convoy on manoeuvres due to drive through the area. However, due to the condition of the groun…

Pike gets his head caught in the park railings and the platoon is summoned to help. Meanwhile, a large bomb has exploded nearby and puts out the gas and water. When Mainwaring returns from out of town…

On a field exercise acting as commandos meeting a secret agent, represented by Mainwaring, the platoon must trust no one for GHQ has sends as counter-agents to catch them. The appearance of a gorilla …

The platoon dresses up as Morris Dancers as part of a carnival to raise money for the town's Spitfire fund, which is still £2,000 short. A Lady Godiva figure will lead the parade but there is confusio…

Lady Maltby offers her Rolls Royce to Mainwaring for use as his staff car. After the car has been disguised with camouflage paint, it has to be repainted black, because the mayor's car has run out of …

After the platoon accidentally shoots a turkey, attempts are made to return it to the local farmer, but he will not accept it so the men come up with the idea of providing a dinner for the local OAPs.

The Colonel orders the platoon to make a training film with a couple of well-known actors, but unknown to Mainwaring, they're to play the Germans. Although Mainwaring refuses to participate, the rest …

Pike finally gets his call-up papers for the RAF, but when his blood donation to the Red Cross is checked, it is found to be from a rare group and he is designated exempt. But now he has to find a way…

At the bank, Mainwaring's office door is replaced with one made of paper. Adding insult to injury of not having a proper entryway, Mainwaring is more annoyed at Pike, the Colonel, and Jones destroying…

Mainwaring gives a lecture on field craft in the vicar's garden, covering what to eat and how to erect a tent. Later, apart from having to put up with the vicar, verger, Hodges, and a gang of boy scou…

When Mainwaring tries to help Jones with his fiduciary issues, the trail is discovered to lead through the platoon, on to Mavis Pike, and ends with Hodges.

Mainwaring has visions of promotion for himself and Wilson, and of expanding the platoon into a company, so he embarks on a recruitment drive. A poster is drawn up and Jones is voted to be on it. Unfo…

The war effort is wearing down the people of Walmington-on-Sea. While practising on a firing range, Mainwaring is told to keep the noise down and Hodges is verbally assaulted for his efforts as chief …

Mainwaring is to umpire in a war game exercise so he gets the use of a car. Pike meets a girl and uses the car to take her out, but they stay out all night, leaving the whole town scandalised.

During a Wings for Victory fundraiser, the platoon reenact the battle between St George and the Dragon, but friction starts when Hodges and the wardens plan the same thing.

Frazer, whom the town has been under the impression has meagre earnings, is, as a matter of fact, rather wealthy. Doctor McCeavedy alerts Mainwaring, who alerts Jones and very soon Frazer's fortune is…

The platoon takes over from the regular army in guarding some vital telephone wires. During an air raid, a bomb lands in the wires and a way has to be found to get it down before it explodes.

Jones wants to wed Mrs Fox but must get Mainwaring's permission. During the reception, an invasion alert is called and Jones spends his wedding night on the beach on guard duty.