Call Girls, The Eradicator, Ballet, Crushing Your Head Part 2, Cause of Cancer, Pear, Kathie and the Blues Guy, Crushing Your Head Part 3 Sketches: Call Girls: Two girls call each other simultaneous…

Thirty Helens 1, Sketch Comedy, Thirty Helens 2, Cabbage Head, Restaurant, Tractor, Sarcastic Guy, Buddy's Better, Thirty Helens 3, Womyn Sketches: - Thirty Helens Agree #1: "Love hurts." - Sketc…

Gunslinger II, Gorilla, Hey Man, Citizen Kane, Contact Lenses, Hey Man 2, Salty Ham, Hey Man 3 Sketches: - Gunslinger #2: Gunfighter that runs a concession stand. - Gorilla: Slapstick sketch abou…

Deja Vu, Asshole, The Daves I Know, Menstruation, House Rules, The Dinner, Sick of the Swiss, Country Doctor Sketches: - Deja Vu: Guys fighting in alley, one gets deja vu - Asshole: Rude guy ruin…

Indian Drum, Geralds, Crushing Disco 1, Good Grampa, Explore Scott, Are Extraterrestrials Dull?, Elvis, Crushing Disco 2 Sketches: - Indian Drum: Man screams about his lost indian drum - Geralds:…

Thirty Helens 1, Bored Robbers, Running Faggot, Thirty Helens 2, Flogging, The Trucker, Can I Keep Him? Sketches: - Thirty Helens Agree #1: "Tattoos aren't for everyone." - Bored Robber: Apatheti…

Hotel La Rut, Plummet, Hotel La Rut 2, First Poem, Fletcher Christian, Hotel La Rut 3, Joymakers Sketches: - Hotel La Rut #1: They can't help thinking about Tony. - Plummet: Parachuters wonder ab…

Ping Pong, The Vacation, Ping Pong 2, Chain Gang, The Banker Doesn't Like Us, Dinosaurs, Ping Pong 3, Tony Comes to Dinner, The Banker Doesn't Like Us 2 Sketches: - Ping Pong #1: The annoying ping …

A Place to Die, Secretaries, A Place to Die 2, Preacher, Weston, A Place to Die 3, Teddy Bears' Picnic Sketches: - A Place To Die #1: Man explains how he's going to die in the house he was born. -…

Hoopla McGuillicutty and Green, Wake Up!, MacIntyre Name, One Step at a Time, Nobody Likes Us, McGuillicutty and Kurosawa, Three for the Moon Sketches: - Hoopla: Security guard complains about hoop…

Night of the Living Dead, Can Never Go Home, Thirty Helens Coleslaw, Under Control, Gunslinger 1, Star-Crossed Lovers, Thirty Helens Hawaii, Barbershop Sketches: - Night Of The Living Dead: Silly p…

Turning Over, Mood Swing, Billy Dreamer 1, Folk Music, Who's Gay in Hollywood?, Billy Dreamer 2, Skoora! Sketches: - Turning Over: Kathie turns over. - Mood Swing: Several mood swings happen in t…

Sign of Loneliness, Networking, Lopez 1, Fat Hitch-Hiker, Lopez 2, No Regrets, The Lamp, Lopez 3, Indian Woman, Lopez 4 Sketches: - Signs Of Loneliness: What's happening in the lonely city. - Net…

Editors Intro, Editors (Film), Break Up, I Lied, Dull Death, I'm a Cat, My Routine, Schoolroom, Editors Finale Sketches: - Editors Intro: Editors discuss what to cut. - Breakup: Song about Bobby'…

Death Row, White Guy, Crazy Love, Buddy's Island, Captain Alan, Mechanic, Baby Sketches: - Death Row: Girls discuss cutest boy on death row. - Man Guy: The faux blues man from Vermont. - Crazy …

The Floater, Is He?, Thirty Helens: Pens, Manny Coon, Thirty Helens: Minds, Bass Player, Compensation, Thirty Helens: Disagree, Power of my Cock Sketches: - The Floater: Man wonders how did this ha…

Boo!, Dracula, The Middle, Crushing Girlfriend, Mass Murderer, B & K, Beautiful Women Sketches: - Boo!: The author of scary books. - Dracula: Leslie has a friend over. - The Middle: A comedy sk…

Love Me, Stinky Pink, Premise Beach, Crouton, Olympics, Premise Beach 2, Shitty Soup, She's Gone Sketches: - Love Me: Guy cooking steaks; guys runs up. - Stinky Pink: Fran's friend Barbara explai…

Hey Baby, Island Boys, Can't Kill Rock, Tarantula, Cat's Away, Mutilated, Car Ride, OWWW Sketches: - Hey Baby: Guys at a bar bark at women. - Island Boys: Island-native brothers discuss manhood. …

Fat Man, How We Met, Thirty Helens: Photos, Bank People, Double Date, Buddy is Canadian, Buddy Holly, Thirty Helens: Helens, Dr. Seuss Bible Sketches: - Fat Man: The fat man song. - How We Met Ne…

Sketches: Death Row: Episode 115 - Stars- Dave, Bruce, Kevin, Mark - Recurring Characters- Melanie - In short- Girls discuss cutest boy on death row. Banker Doesn't Like Us: Epi…

Skits You Millionaires! - Stars: Dave, Bruce, Kevin, Mark, Scott - Recurring Characters: N/A - In short: A man asks the millionaires to leave his trash alone. Oversensitive …

Sketches: - Spring: What a man likes about spring. - Comfortable: How comfortable are these couples? - Trucker #2: Truck Owner makes a phone call. - Hard Day: An undercover alien overreacts t…

Sketches: - Cops - O Canada: Our home and native land. - Trapper: The daily hunt begins. - Cabbage Head - Old Friends: Cabbage Head at it again. - It's Not Working Out #1: Chris is fired. - …

Sketches: - Newscast - Paper Airplanes: The Channel 7 News Team - Sizzler & Sizzler: Sizzler sisters' lounge act. - Pageant: Kathie wins Miss Canadian - Tony & Nick: Two friends in the subway.…

Sketches: - Nutty Bunnies: Nutty bunnies frolic in a field. - Queer Nation: Buddy talks about who is gay. - Cops - Uniform: Proper Uniforms. - Excellent Dinner: Darryl on a Date. - Cops - S…

Sketches: - The Jury: Bruce is charged in court with being an asshole. - Cops - Shootout: A standoff. - Prisoner: Buddy explains how he got put in prison. - Sizzler & The Bank: The Sizzlers tr…

Sketches: - Second Novel: "The Heavy Pen." - Baboon: Humanoids for Humanism help animals. - Hair Loss: A man loses his hair in a restaurant. - Conversation: The amicable breakup turns nasty. …

Sketches: - Lady Is A Tramp #1: A man tries to befriend a whore. - Meet The Geralds: Gerald is in a slump - I'm English: Thinks everyone should speak English. - Lady Is A Tramp #2: Man propose…

Sketches: - I Can't Play The Piano: A horrible lounge act sing a song. - Democracy: A birth of a nation. - Tampa Bay: Gordon is fired. - Cops - Duck: A duck? - Freak: A man who bleeds at wil…

Sketches: - Cops - Dream: Bust the queen while drinking tea. - Crushing Hospital: Mr. Tyzik is injured and must undergo physical therapy. - Cops - Dad: Don't love my dad. - Daddy Drank: The st…

Sketches: - Guess Your Weight: Guy who can guess everything but weight. - Go For Guilt: Nena's first date with a guy. - Hustlers - Math Teachers: The message to the old math teachers. - Fag Ba…

Sketches: - Fact #2: Beethoven's 5th - That's America: Bruce salutes America. - Prisoner's Jam: A politician judge at a jam-tasting contest. - Fact #3: Queen's ABC's - Cuttin' It Close #1: A…

Sketches: - Cops - Bubble Bath: Disturbing. - How I Sleep: Kevin shows us how he sleeps. - Old Friends: Woman talks about her husband's mistress. - Standing: "Stand in the New Style" hip-hop s…

Sketches: - Cops - Good Cop/Bad Cop: They're getting the hang of it. - Brad & The Phone: A guy calls for phone sex. - Fact #1: Uncle Tony. - Book, Bottle, Blonde: A story of a guy who writes c…

Sketches: - Report: A man coughs up the report in a business meeting. - Gandar #1: An attempt at hypnosis. - M. Piedlourde Court Un Marathon: Speaks for itself. - Jazz Music: Bruce hates jazz.…

Sketches: - M. Piedlourde Donne Un Cuop De Pied An Ballon: Speaks for itself. - Scott's Not Gay: Panic! - First Time: Melanie has a date. - Bad News: He's kinda evil. - Poo Guy: Bruce is the…

Sketches: - One Of These Five Men: Really? - Cincinnati Kid: The Cincinnati Kid looks for the Toronto Kid. - Career Ending #2: Leslie de Gaulle Trio -- anti-Communist folk singers. - Thirty Se…

Sketches: - Thousand Dollars: Song in a western bar. - Cops - Towing: Ticketing my car. - Decorator #1: A man gets a demon to brighten up his apartment. - Headcrusher - Rival: A battle to the …

Sketches: - Clandestine Meeting #1: Humanoids for Humanism plan to kill Cabbage Head. - The Letter: A disturbing piece of mail. - Plungers: A man talks about a great plunger salesman. - Clande…

Sketches: - The Cure: A man embarrasses his friend at a bar. - Secretaries - Logey: The office is exhausted. - Thirty Second Stories - Tess: Who Built Cars - Directions: A guy who speaks Engli…

Sketches: - Lively Party: A group of people play charades. - Butcher Shop: Gavin prices meat in a butcher shop - Cops - Sexism: Is it real? - Who's To Blame: The boss looks for someone to blam…

Sketches: Fact #1: Episode 213 - Stars- Bruce - Recurring Characters- It's a Fact Girl - In short- Her uncle Tony can spit really far. Headcrusher - Rival: Episode 217 - Stars- Kevin, Mark - Re…

Sketches: Cops - Prisoner: Episode 205 - Stars- Bruce, Mark - Recurring Characters- Cops - In short- Suspect is locked in car. Comfortable: Episode 201 - Stars- Dave, Mark, Kevin, Scott - Recur…

The feathers go flying when the Chicken Lady spots Rooster Boy; Cabbie has his own set of road rules; some cops have more important things to discuss than a dead body.

Puppy won't do tricks; a man who dresses his best to get the paper; a sleepwalking boy steals his dad's money; a restaurant that has a relationship section.

A construction worker firmly denies sleeping on the job; Bruce discovers that he is only 17 inches tall.

A magical flying pig. The Best Actor award at the Oscars results. An axe murderer politely asks an old lady if he can borrow her axe. Men wear earrings in the 90s.

An open letter addressed to the guy who stole a bike wheel and a letter addressed to the people who stood by and watched.

Cops have a long night at a crime scene; Scott tries to blame a clown for spraying his boss with seltzer water; a drag queen with a gun starts a revolution.

Sir Simone has a date in the Pit of Ultimate Darkness; Bruce meets a man who could be his identical twin; a guy mocks people in a waiting room; Danny Husk reads the paper to discover that he has been …

Einstein is mocked; three men take pride in their huge guts.

An old lady falls down and then gets robbed, but the cops don't want to get involved; a sketch artist draws people he's never seen based only on their voice; street singers receive a visit from the Lo…

Scott's clone won't stop misbehaving. A man shows his girlfriend a dead body in a field. Mark has to fill in for the Fact Girl while she's on strike.

A woman repeatedly remarries after repeatedly marrying the wrong guy. A man is put on trial for sexually harassing himself. The hip guy and his wife introduce their lovers.

A man has to get back up on a horse after choking on a chicken kabob; cops talk about what they might have done if they hadn't become cops; Buddy searches for a new lover.

A man who works in a wig shop tries to convince everyone he's not bald. A pizza guy lusts after schoolgirls. Sid wonders if he is too small to love.

Poems by the Emperor of Japan; Brice's advice for breaking into showbiz.

A businessman just stares; a man debates whether he should call a girl; the cops wonder why someone would abandon a perfectly good potato.

Mississippi Gary sings the After-Death blues; the Fact Girl discusses the importance of cleaning the ears; one of the Sizzler Sisters becomes sane.

A man reminisces about the Flying Pig; a woman names her god; Tanya annoys people at a party.

The alternate conclusion to "Old Yeller"; drugs and other vices; how to deal with noisy people.

Celebrating Scott's 100th portrayal of a waiter; Hecubus is fired and rehired; a wife walks in on her husband and a thief in bed.

The Bearded Lady; spy models; a horny patient.

Skits include: "Multiple Weddings," "Cabbie Bigot" and "My Pen!"

Skits include: "Chicken Lady at a Strip Bar," "Queen Speaks to Canada" and "Bar Fight.".

Skits: - Cameraman Ted Riley Memorial - The Dog for Whom I Feel Nothing - Whores - Pitiful Mechanic - Spider on the Face - Whores - Hyper Business Executive - Cabbie Delivers Rush-Hour…

- Street Fight -- Parents Watching - Cathy & Kathie & the New Girl - Street Fight -- Confusion - Darryl on a Date -- the Oompah Band - Street Fight -- Unfair Fight - Buddy -- Virtual Realit…

- Fiore Parfums Commercial (S)(4): commercial of Fiore Parfums (Francesca Fiore) - Whores (SK)(4): "Are you holding out on me?" (Maudre, Rudy) - The Fantasy Sexual Indescretion (BKM)(4): woman wh…

The Governor's Wrong Number Spot Bellini Contest The Alley Fight 1 Multiple Personalities The Alley Fight 2 Sandwich People Never Put Salt In Your Eyes

Skits: Newscasters - Stars- Dave, Mark, Scott - Recurring Characters- Nina Spudkneeyak, Channel 7 News - In short- The weatherman is not God. Emergency Room Practical Joker - Stars- Dave, Br…

Radio Big Bats Apartment Games 1 Door-to-Door Knife Sharpener Progress in Food Apartment Games 2 Forced Date

Crazy Dad (KD)-A man tells a story about his dad locking him up for 10 years, but as a cruel joke. Chicken Lady Goes Home (all)-The chicken lady visits her old house (Chicken Lady, Tucker, Bearded La…

Hookers - Rich Guy • Gavin - Religion • Try it NOW! • Just Terrific • Hookers - Puppet • Coincidence • Listening In • Hookers - New Coke • Thanksgiving

Chalet 2000

Receptionist • Walk A Mile In My Shoes • Cops - Rookie Trick Question • A Soulfulness They Never Had • Cops - Rookie Coffee • Answering Machine • Celebrity • Cops - Rookie Puke • Divorce Court

Alan Bouvier • Career Crisis • Nice Day For Work • Hookers - Plastic Surgery • Armada - Understudy • Hookers - Commitment • Lost and Found • Clothesline • Hookers - Too Easy • Comfortable High

Luck • Fine Line • Tuck it In • Losing My Religion • Serpico • The Hangover • Wild Man

Cops - Fridge • Third Time Lucky • Cops - Spring, Exposed • Hookers - Documentaries • Nudity • Cops - Europe • Business World • Katnapped

The Unexpirienced Cannibal (DKS)-He is not an EXPERIENCED cannibal Santa's Visit (MSK)-Boys have a doo doo and girls have a who hah. Spot Belinni Conclusion (B)-The exciting conclusion of who gets t…

New Guy • Dad and Son Phone Call • Cops - Puck • Clear the Air • Seat 12B • Cops - Hair • Roller Bladers • Love and Sausages

Guilt • The Kathi's - Monday Meeting • The Voices • Steps - Hot • Becoming A Man • Steps - Drag • The Collector • Steps - Issues

Pops • Poker Face • Cheers • Cops - Worms • The Nap • Cops - Hungover • Contest • Just One Bite

Hookers - Transvestite • Excellent Composer • Hookers - Movie Star • Quarter Life Crisis • Cemetery • Drunk As a Crow • Advantage

People - Bike Courier • Ricardo • Chargin' Ya • Atrium • People - Winnipeg Chick • Art Studio • People - Hopeless Romantic • Surrogate

Cabbie • Seminar • Gezbo • Diploma • Cabbie Two • On Board • Scary Sandwich • Extreme Argument

Skits: Fiore Parfums Commercial - Stars- Scott - Recurring Characters- Francesca Fiore - In short- Smell like a bitch. Things To Do - Stars- Dave, Kevin - Recurring Character…

Skits: Inexperienced Cannibal - Stars- Dave, Kevin, Scott - Recurring Characters- n/a - In short- He didn't get on the plane expecting to eat anyone. Try it NOW! - Stars- Kevin, Sc…

Idiot Boy: Assistant, Cops: Interrogation 1, Feelyat, Cops: Interrogation 2, Catching Up, Martyr, Cops: Interrogation 4, The Beard Skits: - Idiot Boy at Work: Idiot Boy is causing problems at work …

Cops: Interrogation 5, Please Please Please, Special Sauce, Chance Meeting, Cops: Interrogation 7, Document, Grizzly, Cops: Interrogation Finale Skits: - Police Department: 10:00 a.m. Precinct House…

Hookers: Drum Up Business, How To, Just One Guy, Hookers: Rap Music, Por-eef, Jug Head, The Hit Skits: - Whores: drumming up business - Meet Your New Male Slave: Buddy gets a new male slave - Some…

God is Dead, New Boots, Fast Breakup, Hookers: Porno, Rockey, Hookers: Price List, Montreal 2, Dessert Skit: - God is Dead: newsreel footage of the death of God - New Boots: workers with steel-toed…

Lesbian & Gay Pride, Waiter With Stumps For Hands, Squealin', Gavin: Leaking, Protest, Good to Cry 2, Drag Queens & Leather People, Sounds Skit: - Steps: gay pride day - Stump Hand Waiter: the wait…

Fight-Picking Guy - This Close (SD)(5): guy in bar who wants to get in a fight • Weston & Virgil in 1972 (SMB)(5): Weston & Virgil at school in 1972 (Weston Esterhazy, Virgil) • Power-Mad after Promot…

Slow Motion Trick (MDK)(5): guy acts slow to make friend leave • Ex-Girlfriend Relocation (MKD)(5): guy wants to have ex-girlfriend relocated • Whores (DS)(5): looking for a hooker with a heart of gol…

555-SLUT (none): gross guy's phone sex ad • Chicken Lady at the Mall (DMSB)(5): Chicken Lady masturbates at the mall (Chicken Lady) • Old People (B)(5): Bruce monologue about old people • Office Joker…

Steps* -- Coming Out (DSK)(5): Steps guys discuss coming out to their parents (Steps) • Crab Shampoo (KM)(5): American in Canada wants crab shampoo • Obfuscator Boyfriend (DB)(5): man obfuscates about…

Lick Town Clean (DK)(5): residents must lick the town clean • Agents in the Bar (SMK)(5): the Sudelmans in the bar order drinks after last call (Sudelmans) • The Lovers 3* (DM)(5): the lovers talk abo…

The Test-Tube Baby (SD)(5): man complains about being a test-tube baby • Kathie & Dry Cleaner (BMSK)(5): Kathie sleeps with dry cleaner (Kathie, Cathy, Tanya, Secretary, Bigot Cabbie) • Whores (DSK)(5…

Shoe Shine--He's not stoned; he's just noticing things. • The Monkeys--Be afraid. Be very afraid; he might let the monkeys loose. • You Scuzzy Piece of Filth!--He dialed wrong. • Raj and Christine: Te…

Clothes-Talker (K)(5): man talks to his clothes • Sid & Sharisse Wedding (all)(5): Sid & Sharisse get married (Sid, Sharisse, Sid's Friend) • Whores (DSM)(5): film producer (Whores) • Darn Near Puked …

Police Department (BM)(5): 2:16 p.m. Cherry Beach - madness in L.A. (Police Department) • Bleeding Ear (KDB)(5): man's ear starts bleeding at dinner • Bikini Inspector (B)(5): man complains about ""Bi…

Cyclops (SD)(5): cyclops at a party • The Convenience Store Worker (all)(5): A convenience store clerk has his performance reviewed by executives • Hillbilly's Problem (MDSKJ)(5): A hillbilly has some…

Wrote the Report Naked (DKS)(5): free spirit writes a report (Danny Husk, A.T. & Love Boss, Bingo the Clown) • Don't Shut off My Cable! (SM)(5): Korean War vet doesn't want to lose his cable (Disgusti…

Greater Possibilities (DK)(5): Man with submarine for an office • Steps Guys at Home (SDK)(5): Butch calls 555-JERK (Steps) • "Living Proof" Press Conference (MKB)(5): Band dies in a bus crash • Big B…

Band Killer (BKM)(5): Capture of a serial killer (Police Department) • Brown Stuff (DS)(5): A.T. & Love boss has a problem (Danny Husk, A.T. & Love Boss) • I'm Late (KB)(5): The perfect couple practic…

Francesca, Bruno, & the Voiceover Guy (SDM)(5): voiceover guy corrects Francesca's grammar (Francesca Fiore, Bruno Puntz Jones) • Sperm Bank I (SMBK)(5): the humanoids rob a sperm bank (Humanoids for …

Noisy Roommates (DK)(5): man has problems with his "44" noisy roommates • Memoirs (SD)(5): husband and wife read "Memoirs" and reminesce • Journey to the Top of the Stairs (KSM)(5): a musical number

End of the Beginning (P)(5): Bellini listens to the radio (Paul Bellini) • Armada Grows Old (MBK)(5): Armada sees the future (Armada) • The Sixth Kid (all)(5): Jeff Berman tribute • Buddy's Bar - Clos…

This Season 5 Best-Of Compilation features fan-favorite sketches: God is Dead, Chicken Lady at the Mall, Hillbilly's Problem, The Convenience Store Worker, Meet Your New Male Slave, and Disgusting Old…